North Luzon Monitor

North Luzon

The Turtle Named Speed

Leslie Dulfo
Latest posts by Leslie Dulfo (see all)

I think in a world that is fast changing, it’s getting harder to know your priorities so much that we tend to question many things. However, we realize that not all questions are answered and that some answers take the slowest pace – slower than a turtle’s pace.

I used to remember that turtles are said to be bad pets according to Feng Shui because of their slow mobility. I also remember a friend naming her turtle “Speed” to at least combat the fact of being slow. Does that make sense?

In a world where money and power is so inducing and momentarily comforting, will you choose power and money over your mental peace? I mean some people have held on to their own power and money so much that they thought it will never wear off. For a person diagnosed with mental illness, I’ve learned to choose my peace even if it means I will stand alone without the money and the power.

But then, I remember we do not enjoy money per se. Sometimes, we enjoy them for the perks of the material things that we can buy through it – even for expensive bags or shoes perhaps?

But sometimes, I realize that we choose the money and power also for the people we love or at least prioritize. So, maybe that explains why money and power are so closely inclined to make you lose your mind too?

Maybe then, it’s a political thing. Maybe then, it’s a poverty thing. Maybe, just maybe, it’s a couple of both internal and external factors combined altogether – perhaps socio-cultural or sect-based religion or even more!

Contentment is such a big word. In a poor country like us where healthcare systems are hardly affordable and livelihood opportunities are not enough, we often get lost along our way. Sometimes, we need to be reminded that although it is a long process, we are still blessed, fortunate or whatever “watchamacallit” you call it.

I remember that as a person with lived experiences of a mental illness, it took time for me to be capable of doing things on my own. It also took me more years to realize that there is a need to be independent and to balance things. It took years to realize that I really needed a routine and to wake myself up although I was feeling a bit under the weather.

I also realized that it is better to do it at my own pace because usually, everything is a long process. Although time is a measuring element, it waits for no one but it also does not have a seat belt to keep you safe in a fast-moving car. You are afforded to take it slowly like in a traffic from Baguio to La Trinidad and vice versa. Also, it’s like the occasional bumps here and there with precautionary signs of “men at work” to denote that everything is a work in progress. It is also like cascading the airport terminals for your domestic or international travel with a heavy load or a few extra baggage like cabbage?

Maybe, I’ll search for one snail in my mom’s garden to pet it and call it “Speed” too or perhaps I would prefer a cat or dog named “Slow”? Contradictions? Reality check – still intact!

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