Leslie Dulfo
“The comfort zone is the great enemy of courage and confidence.” — BRIAN TRACY
Our friend Brian Tracy (who just became our friend as of this moment of my writing or your reading) is a motivational speaker and book writer on management, leadership and other areas. You know how the world is right now, you are not primarily secluded in one area or field of expertise. To cut the crap short, we are going to talk about comfort zones and toxicity – the experienced way.
If you find any triggers or need further help on mental health as you read this, you can reach the Baguio City Health Services Office Mental Health and Wellness Unit at 0919-069-6361, Department of Health CAR – Mental Health Unit at 0938-757-6458 and the Baguio General Hospital Psychiatry Unit at (074) 442-2365.
Comfort zones are so comforting so much that you feel safe at home without any amount of stress. It’s zoning into a process of ease. Yet, it is also a place where you will not grow – a place that will not challenge you in any way. It is like working at home in your pajamas and unbathed- not so challenging.
It is said that change is the only thing constant, it is something different and peculiar to your emotions like Riley’s world on Inside Out 2. Hey, no spoiler alert on this and no paid ads!
It is a new experience every now and then where your heart pumps fast or makes you anxious plus a couple of other mixed emotions. To some – it may be caused by a place, person, work or object and may that harness excitement.
The truth is, not every change is exciting or even rejuvenating. It may be intoxicating and getting you into different defenses and excuses. However, it must be something you really have to go through inorder to be you – learning and growing.
I have made a lot of resetting and restarting in my life and I guess it was always for the better. Sometimes, I don’t realize things as I question them but they do work out fine in the long run. Some may be painful or frustrating at first, but it eventually sticks long enough like a glue stick. I think it’s like my animation class beating deadlines full of drawings when I was accustomed to just writing. It is the thrill of upskilling worth the learning and experience. It is proof that everything has a reason for being.
Toxicity is also being in an all too familiar stance as in the case of comfort zones.The reason why most physically, verbally, emotionally and economically beaten up people never let go of their abusers – to the point of losing self-worth, self-respect or even life.
A lot of times, people end up wondering what toxicity is? Even culture has their own relevance in this charade, even people who come and go in our lives can stage such toxicity and, even ourselves, we end up being toxic at times. I confess to this fact myself!
I think that no matter how hard toxicity is, it is something, someone or some place we can let go of. But it matters that we are aware of that toxicity in others and often, ourselves. Perhaps the greatest measuring tool is realizing that there is not an ounce for growth and development at all.
If you are still asking what toxicity is and what can we do to get out or let go, as everything in life is, these things are subjective – it differs from one person to another. The common point is – there will always be graceful exits. I think there’s no real dead end in life as long as you are living – only the courage to reset and restart.
Should you need to reset and restart, perhaps the first step is the idea to be brave to let go of things that do not benefit your mental health already. Find a place where you will be loved and appreciated. Go to a place where you will be challenged to improve and know your self-worth. Afterall, what matters first and foremost is you! Remember, you are worthy – many times!