- Humor is a Friend - January 30, 2025
- Inside-out, Outside-in - January 23, 2025
- Affirmations - January 9, 2025
Standing at five feet tall and a person who is chubby (take note, chubby but not fat) with small framed bones and a small face, I have often been mistaken as less than my actual age. Some say, perhaps I have that look because I didn’t have any problems. There it goes – fat chance!
A lot of times people say I act childlike when in fact they are trying to mean that I act childishly. These are two different words. Childlike acting-out that positive playful strides like a child. Meanwhile, being childish is immature. I have often been hurt at times. Sometimes, I think maybe the mental illness sort of gave me that character especially with the results of fair-weathered friends I get.
How many times have I asked myself, “Why me?” But sometimes answers are never apparent until such time that you take time to look back. But in the process, I sure am not going to change anything about my past.
Why? It is because I have no control of it. I mean, it has happened! Also, people are fighting their own demons. Look how poverty and current events make up for most of the news. Bad news always gets me down.
But if I were to compare… Bad word – to compare. But if I were to compare my problems in the world and take time for gratitude, there are people who don’t have a house to sleep nor food on their plate when I have a roof over my head and a warm bed to cozy up to.
So really, there’s no time for self-pity. It’s not a good time also comparing our mental health condition because we all are different. We all are a diverse kind – a weird kind positively put as unique. We all have that in us.
Every time I meet with people from the Baguio Women with Disability Organization, I realize how infinitely unique we all are. Start with Senior Citizens who have Orthopedic Disabilities, people with a knack for Hard of Hearing, Blind women, Autism Spectrum Disorder teens, Cancer patients, Psychosocial Disability persons, Learning and Intellectual Disability and Rare Disease Conditions, I am grateful that I am still alive – learning and experiencing life as it is.
As I look into their eyes or as I stand with them considering that some eyes are permanently closed and some can’t stand straight, I am happy to be part of a community opting to make change. I admire these different women – of various ages and backgrounds and have proven themselves to be strong.
Sometimes, I have caught myself saying that sometimes you have to go through things in order to be you. You have to be forced to a dead-end to make a choice to be eventually strong. So I guess we are strong. You are strong in your own way!
Many times, this same community has introduced me to Para-Sports but considering that there is not yet a category for Para-Sports for Psychosocial Disabilities considering Para-Sports really tackle Physical Disabilities ever since the start of time. Well, correct me if I’m wrong.
Anyway, without any Para-Sports for Psychosocial Disability, I would take a chance to muster all my courage and my anger to beat that shuttlecock in badminton. Thinking of exes and people I loved to spank and spit on their faces. Kidding!
I think it is a good outlet. It goes well as a form of exercise too.
You know, I also realize that many times you know what to do but you just don’t do it! The mind is a wonder but the will to do it – to act on it takes time. I feel I need some conditioning for that. Good excuse, huh?
Sometimes, I do wish I am WonderWoman or maybe “Darna” saying, “‘Ding ang bato!” Of course, with the sexiest and prettiest fierce pose plus the red, yellow and blue letter lingerie?
We can be SuperMan or Wonderwoman, Captain Barbel, Zsazsa Saturnah, Darna or anyone. We have unique superpowers. It is by knowing ourselves that we find our inner strengths.
I wish you strength as I say, “Up, up and away!” or “With great power comes great responsibility.”