Myra G. Gahid, RPsy, RPM
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In my practice as a therapist, one of the most common questions I receive from clients, especially the ones who are seeking professional help for the first time is, “Baliw na po baa ko? (Am I crazy?) As much as I assure clients that the term ‘crazy’ is considered derogatory and not used in our field, I have observed that their follow-up question is either “Hindi naman po forever ganito ako?” (It doesn’t mean that I’ll be like this forever, does it?) or “Sa tingin niyo po ba gagaling pa ako?” (Do you think I’ll be well?). Reflecting on these questions directs me to focus on the stigma that surrounds mental health.
Despite the spotlight placed on the topic of mental health during the pandemic, the avoidant glances and scared tones of clients when they enter the online session are palpable signs that tell me the amount of courage, they must have gathered to consider seeking professional help, booking a session, and attending the session. Believe it or not, most of my clients do not look like they are distressed or that they have heavy emotional loads. Some clients wear a nice smile on their faces, while others look well-polished with their makeup and neat hairstyles. Contrary to how most people might think mental struggles are manifested, a smile doesn’t always mean happiness in therapy sessions. Meanwhile, tears flow easier than most clients anticipate. I’ve had many clients apologize for crying, taking pauses, or drinking water after a painful reminiscence.
One of the foundations of a therapy session is providing a safe space for clients to be, to momentarily allow them to put down the mask/s and burdens that they carry. When a client asks if they may share the details of their problem, I remind them that the session is open for their vulnerability. The fear of being judged, laughed at, or worse, being shut off has been expressed to me numerous times. With that said, I can’t help but wonder how much pain can a person bear to feel like no one can and will listen to them. When I talk about therapy sessions with other people, especially with the ones who haven’t tried being in one, I tell them that a therapy session is a two-way street where the client and the therapist learn from each other. While the client shares their story, the therapist assists the client in processing their emotions and identifying the next steps the client is comfortable doing or at least willing to explore.
As much as therapy aims to provide support, we can only do so much as your therapist. The real work, despite what many people believe, lies outside the therapy session. Challenging as it may be, the client holds the power to alter their response to their problems. This means YOU are capable of change.
So, if you are willing to seek professional help, despite the negative self-talk, you are stronger than you think. People are willing to help you, as long as you are willing to help yourself.
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